Just One Touch of You Dear Lord, Bethany Day

I was born and raised in a Christian family, so God has always been the center of my family. But it wasn't until the age of 14, that I really had a personal touch with God.

When I was 11½, my mother found out that she had breast cancer. For the next 2½ years she was battling for her life. For a period of time, I was tossed about between my family members because my parents didn't want me to witness the harm that my mom would endure due to chemotherapy and radiation. During these times, I desperately prayed and petitioned the Lord not to let her die.

For the next 2½ years I spent my afternoons doing homework in and out of the hospital. The familiar faces of the patients (in oncology) greeted me daily as I made my way down to my mother's room. Then one day as I was walking to her room, I saw several nurses and doctors run into her room. As soon as I got there they pronounced her dead. While I was walking down the hallway, she took her final breath. As I went inside her room, the only thing that I could now do was to hold her hand, say how much I loved her, and tell her goodbye. This was the turning point of my life.

That night as my dad and I were driving home, I felt a tremendous lack in my being. I literally felt as if someone had reached in and grabbed my heart and now the only thing remaining was a huge hole. I asked my dad what I could do to fill up this hole in my heart, and for once in his life, he didn't have the answer. He told me that the only thing that I could do was to pray. Inwardly, my initial reaction was, “How could I pray to a God that let my mother die?” But regardless of how I felt, I prayed. That night I prayed, cried, and prayed some more. When I woke up the next morning, I was whole again. The hole in my heart was filled and peace was given to me. Ever since then, I've never questioned the Lord concerning this matter. He had become so real to me that the only thing left for me to do was to just love Him.

The local church really helped me to know the Lord in a more personal way. Throughout my mom's sickness many believers meeting with the local church helped out in numerous ways. For weeks at a time, different ones would take turns cooking meals for our family. Others would stay with my mom in the hospital and would sing, pray, and read the Bible with her. This really strengthened me spiritually. Every little detail of our daily situation was either taken care of by these believers or my family members. Without the Body and God's mercy, I don't think I could have made it through in one piece. The local church is filled with fellow pursuers of Christ, and this strengthens me to pursue the Lord more and to love Him in a more intimate way. It's really difficult to express in words how much I love the believers meeting with the local church and how thankful I am to the Lord that He has placed me here.